WHY I LEFT THE CHURCH: Out with the old, in with the new - Kenyon's Blogversation
Those who know me are aware of my history of being a lover of Jesus Christ, biblical truths, and all-things God. It's true, I've been preaching the Word of God since the age of 10 in front of many different audiences. I've known at the age of 4 that I was going to do this for the rest of my Life. And I'm still quite passionate about it.
But as a millennial, I must admit, I have hit a turning point in my Life. This defining moment has forced me to put religion and the Church--as we've always known it--on trial. Let's be real, the preacher who hollers from the pulpit things like, "WHY QUESTION GOD? IT IS A SIN OR A SIGN OF LACK OF FAITH TO QUESTION HIS GREATNESS," are nothing but fakes, phonies, and frauds who don't know the Bible very well. The Bible is full of people who questioned God, and God still used them, blessed them, and accepted them into the Kingdom. If one cannot investigate the principles and institutions that they believe and throw so much of their support in, then is it much of an authentic belief?
Here I am, 27 years old. I'm happily married with two living children. I have one deceased. And Life--or should I say Spirit--has brought me to this moment of transformation. I'm at the inauguration of freedom. I'm on the precipice of eternal change, immortal liberty. Simply put, I'm breaking out of the old and unhealthy traditions that I have bought into for so long as it relates to Church and faith.
It all started when the Spirit brought me to a revelation moment of what season of Life I was in. In my 27th year of Life, I have realized that since 19 I was experiencing a Quarter Life Crisis. I write in detail about this experience in my new book, The Quarter Life Crisis: A Spiritual Journey Back to Self (shameless plug, just copy & paste link in search bar: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Kenyon+R.+Dudley). I'll spare you the details here. But needless to say from 19 to now, I was at a place where nothing else could satisfy. I was tired of fake. I was tired of doing things the traditional way; even though I knew most of it no longer worked. I was tired of just working a regular job and not living in my purpose. I was tired of being stuck while it seemed like most everyone around me or on Facebook was getting ahead. I was even tired of the Church: the lies, the antics, the ritualistic and pious services that never moved a fly let alone a mountain, the never-getting-what-God-promised type of Life. All of it was worthless to me. Here I am 27 years old. I've gone to Church just about all of my Life. Most of my belief system and the way I do things in the world is based on what I have learned in Church. I can't even say it was biblical. This is the very reason I chose to divorce Church.
While I still consider myself a preacher of the Gospel. And while I still believe that God is real and that worship to God is of necessity in this Life, I am no longer a prisoner to the chains of old antiquated Church doctrine, ritualistic mundane services that mean nothing today, and erroneous practices and thoughts that hold no relevance or truth to who God really is and what God really wants to do in my Life. I HAVE DIVORCED THE OLD CHURCH!
Now, I would be a fool to say that the old Church taught me nothing. It did. The old Church introduced me to a loving God. The old Church brought me to repentance and salvation. It taught me passion. The old Church taught me discipline and how to speak before a crowd of people. And the old Church most certainly taught me about spiritual gifts, prayer, and strong relentless faith. But what it failed to teach me was the number one thing you'll need to know if you're going to overcome in this Life and if you're going to reign with God. It failed to teach me about Truth and how to Live in it (Authentic Living). Most of who taught me these things weren't truly Living what they taught me. They weren't practicing what they preached. They somehow Lived double Lives. They believed one thing while in Church or in front of the saints; while their Lives showed something totally opposite. Usually something like defeat or deceit. And I'm just not a fan of that. If I preach that God wants to bless me, then I shouldn't wake up almost everyday of my Life broke, busted, and simply disgusted with my Life. If I preach that God is a Healer, then I shouldn't go through a quarter of my Life not really witnessing a bonafide miracle. Much of the old Church and the old saints were all talk and no show. It's for this reason that I had to divorce the old Church and embrace a new way of worship.
The new way of worship may not mean that I attend church five days out of the week unless it's authentic to my journey. It doesn't mean that I don't slip and fall, so long as I learn from it and be authentic about it. Being authentic in my fall means to acknowledge it and then learn the lesson that God would have me learn. No condemnation needed please! This new way of worship means that I get to preach in ripped jeans and a t-shirt if I so please because that's what's authentic to me. So long as I've not lost my decency and dignity or placed someone else in a truly unethical position. It means not being afraid to sit with a King or Queen who may not necessarily believe what I believe, but I take every human interaction as a divine transaction: an opportunity to learn and be a divine representative for my King of Kings. This new way of worship means that if I miss Church on a Sunday, I am not damned to Hell. It means relearning the Truth about Hell and tithes in the first place. They're not what many have taught us to believe.
This new way of worship is AUTHENTICITY. What and Who is God growing me into? And am I staying true to that while my Spirit is on this natural journey? Most of all, have I been used in the maximum way that God has ordained for me? And have I Lived in a way that allows me to Live eternally with God? Those are the real questions.
Who wore the best priestly collar? Who's Church service was the best? Who shouted the best? Who has the most members? Are homosexuals more apt to go to Hell over liars? All of these ideas and the like have nothing to do with the Truth of the matter. These are simply ritualistic, dogmatic, and legalistic ideas that keep those who are married to the old Church bound in shackles and chains. Here's why I divorced the old Church.
No more will I live my Life inauthentic. I'm 27 and I've already missed out on some great moments in my Life designed by God. Although, I am convinced that God is Sovereign and has worked out my journey for my good, I do realize that I have to do my part to position myself to experience all that God wants to manifest in my Life. And apart of that effort means that I must drop the weights of unhealthy traditions and embrace God's Truth. So not only do I divorce the old Church, but old unhealthy habits, thoughts, old jobs that don't matter, old friends who no longer make me feel authentic, and any other things or institutions that force me out of the Truth of God and authentic Living.
I encourage you to catch the train of freedom too.
Out with the old, in with the new...LIFE.